


From the Ashes

by A Magiluna Stormwriter (ariestess)



Series: Once Shipper Madness Poetry [9]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Character Development, Character Study, Community: onceuponaland, F/M, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-11
Updated: 2014-07-11
Packaged: 2018-02-08 12:19:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 747
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1940823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ariestess/pseuds/A%20Magiluna%20Stormwriter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Regina's thoughts on the forms of love in her life, good and bad.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Little Girl

**Author's Note:**

> Date Written: 11 July 2014  
> Word Count: 747  
> Written for: [](http://onceuponaland.livejournal.com/profile)[](http://onceuponaland.livejournal.com/)**onceuponaland** 's Round 8 "Ship Madness"  
> Summary: Regina's thoughts on the forms of love in her life, good and bad.  
> Spoilers: Just consider the entirety of the series up for grabs, okay?  
>  **Warnings: Mentions of domestic abuse and rape.**  
>  Website: ShatterStorm Productions – Doggie Duo  
> Link to: <http://bdkk.shatterstorm.net/>  
> Archive: ShatterStorm Productions & AO3 only…all others ask for permission & we'll see…  
> Feedback: Constructive criticism is always welcome.
> 
> Author’s Disclaimer: "Once Upon a Time," the characters, and situations depicted are the property of Adam Horowitz, Edward Kitsis, Kitsis/Horowitz, and ABC Studios. This piece of fan fiction was created for entertainment not monetary purposes. Previously unrecognized characters and places, and this story, are copyrighted to the author. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author. This site is in no way affiliated with "Once Upon a Time," ABC, or any representatives of the actors.
> 
> Author’s Notes: So this was really intense to write, to say the least. I kind of wanted to go more in depth, but at the same time, I shied away from that. While my head!canon includes Regina being abused by both her mother and Leopold, albeit in different ways, it's always difficult to write that.
> 
> Author's Notes 2: The entirety of this poem was written while listening to In This Moment's "From The Ashes", which is where I got the title of this poem. It fit the general scope of where I wanted this poem to go, so I went with it. I don't look askance at any inspiration that's tossed my way.
> 
> Dedication: My muses, as always…
> 
> Beta: None, so all mistakes are entirely mine.

True Love is magic,  
The most powerful magic  
Known in all the lands.  
When you have found your True Love,  
Life's supposed to be perfect.

It's a fairytale  
To think that everyone gets  
To find their True Love,  
Let alone get to keep them  
And live together in bliss.

It's an outright lie  
That parents teach their children  
To keep them quiet  
And give them false hopes and dreams.  
It allows the parents peace.

Little girls have it worse  
Than any little boy does.  
Boys don't have to be  
Perfect in all areas  
Of their lives to get married.

Little boys have fun  
While little girls must learn much  
To keep a husband.  
It is the woman who must  
Keep the home perfectly clean.

When I was so young  
That Daddy was my hero,  
I prayed for a man  
That was exactly like him.  
I knew I could love that man.

I planned out our life,  
Every detail I thought of.  
It was so perfect.  
We'd have three faultless children,  
Two boys and a little girl.

We'd live modestly  
But we'd be happy and loved.  
We'd want for naught.  
We'd grow older together,  
Surrounded by family.


	2. Maiden

Childhood dreams become  
Fodder for a maiden's heart.  
From my first moon's bleed,  
Mama worked diligently  
To train me in wifely arts.

I'd been doing some  
From the moment I was born,  
Or so it had seemed.  
Mama was adamant that  
I be a proper lady.

When Daddy hired him,  
I fell instantly in love  
With my stable boy.  
Daniel was everything that  
I'd dreamt of my entire life.

Daniel was handsome,  
Sweet, and incredibly kind  
To all that he met.  
I found him even-tempered  
With stallion and mare alike.

I have never loved  
As I loved my sweet Daniel.  
I gave him my heart.  
Luckily he had no qualms  
In giving me his, too.

His thoughts on marriage  
Mirrored mine so perfectly.  
He wanted the things  
I wanted for our homestead.  
But he wanted to be known.

Our only fights were  
About telling my parents.  
He was impatient,  
Not liking the subterfuge  
I forced on him for safety.

But Mama found out,  
Just as she always seemed to.  
She put a stop to  
Any thoughts I harbored of  
Running away with Daniel.


	3. Queen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: There are mentions of abuse and rape in this part, but nothing graphic.

Daniel'd barely died  
When Leopold married me.  
I became a queen  
And a mother in one day.  
Just not of my dream children.

The gods heard my prayers  
And kept me barren to him.  
Snow was child enough  
To have to raise by myself.  
I didn't want more of them.

Leopold's anger  
Became more terrifying  
Than Mama's quiet rage.  
Mama's wounds were never seen,  
But Leopold didn't care.

Mama used magic,  
Leopold backhanded me  
More often than not.  
That wasn't his sole weapon  
To keep me perfectly kowed.

When the genie came,  
He brought an out from the pain  
And degradation  
Leopold controlled me with.  
It seemed the perfect escape.

Once Leopold died,  
The genie became my slave.  
His obsessive love  
Fueled his desire to serve me.  
I used him well and often.

Love died with Daniel,  
Of that there can be no doubt.  
Anything he left  
Was beaten out of me by  
Leopold's near-boundless rage.

After that, fear ruled.  
Sex was manipulation,  
The means to an end.  
Sex was a source of power,  
And I wanted that power.


	4. Woman

When I cast the curse,  
I planted a few safeguards.  
Graham was one of them.  
He was so obedient  
And let me feel less alone.

It wasn't enough.  
My heart still ached for Daniel  
And the love we had.  
I needed to fill the void,  
The monotonous chasm.

After the curse broke  
At the hands of the Savior,  
My heart still yearned, craved,  
For something I couldn't find.  
Until Victor brought him back.

It looked like Daniel,  
But it wasn't _my_ Daniel.  
My Daniel begged me  
To end his tormented pain,  
And let my heart love again.

It was difficult  
To let him go finally.  
I wanted to die,  
Wanted to end my torture,  
But his final plea stopped me.

"Then love again." How?  
My heart was hardened and black  
From my evil deeds.  
Who could possibly want that?  
Was there enough good still left?

And then _he_ came back,  
Someone I chose to forget,  
The fairy's fortune.  
He terrified me again,  
But fascinated me, too.

Daniel's words bade me  
To open myself to love.  
Will this outlaw thief  
Restore balance in my heart  
And make me whole finally?


End file.
